Solve the Violence in My Community!

by David Garner

Growing up in a single parent home, my mother was on her own. As for my father, very abusive. I think that’s why they broke up. How can you tell someone that you love them, then beat them until they’re bleeding? My father used to tell me that. As for my mother the same thing. I wonder if that’s what the slave master said. My mother never talked about college, or going into any high school sports. I wish that she had talked to me about going into college. I think that I would have stayed out of trouble. I would have never cut school.

It was a cloudy day outside that day. Clouds were moving fast. I went out to a friend’s house. I don’t think he knew but I had stolen from him a few weeks ago. It was an ounce of weed. I thought that I had got away clean. Come to find out his neighbor had told on me. I didn’t find out until later. So while in his house we got high. After we said our what’s up. We jumped right into getting high. It was like Cheech & Chong. Smoking the bong. While sitting there getting high slowly forgetting where I was at, someone creep out of the closet on me. I was hit with a fist from the blind side. Straight to my head. That woke me up out of my high. Behind the fist came a shot gun cocked back. I manage to push my way out the room, ran down the hall out the front door. I was praying that I get home alive. I lived right down the street. Tears coming down my eyes, vision blurry, while my heart’s beating fast. I had took that ounce so that I could buy myself some Nikes and a pager. I couldn’t get it at home so I committed a crime. I couldn’t wait any longer. Thank God that I made it home that evening. I managed to walk away with just a bump. I made it home. I can’t wait until my mom gets home so that I can tell her. I just need someone to talk to. I hear a car coming up now.

I think that’s her. Beep! Beep! Beep! Unlocking the door from the outside. I rushed up, undid the lock and I had swung the door open. “Mom I’m glad to see you.” “Boy help me with the groceries! I don’t have time right now I’m on a lunch break.” She moving fast just taking the groceries out the trunk and putting them on the ground. “Baby make sure that you put all these up for me I’ll be back. I don’t have time!” “Mom I need to talk with you before you go?” “Baby I just don’t have the time right now.” “Ok,” I had said as she was getting into the car to leave. After this I was mad and had been hurt by my mother’s response. I wish that I had a meeting or a mentor to talk with. But I didn’t so I had went to the streets. I know that I could talk and relate to those that are on the streets.

While living on the streets I started to steal and sell dope to people that had knew my nickname. After awhile I started to indulge myself. I had been hurt at home. When I was high I didn’t really worry about that day my mom had ignored me. After awhile things got real bad. I started sleeping in abandoned houses and at friends’ houses. My life had really down-spiraled. I quit going to school altogether. Doing drugs and alcohol I had really stopped being accountable and responsible. I really just gave up on my life. I became a bad boy. After a while of running the streets I ended up in jail, from there to a group home. This was my first program. While in jail I told the court that I had a drug problem and had needed help. So they give it to me. This was my first time ever going to any kind of rehab.

For my first time I was scared, I didn’t know what to expect. Coming into this program I was stripped of my clothes and put into reassessment. I couldn’t talk to anyone and they couldn’t talk with me. This was my first time, and I want some help. Walking down the halls were big mirrors on the walls. Walking down a little farther was a fish tank room with a TV and a big fish tank. Coming up to another room this one was called the pool room with a pool table and TV. Downstairs was a room fully equipped with weights. The food was excellent. While in this group home which was a 12 month program came a lot of essays. I didn’t know anything about alcohol meeting or drugs. I didn’t know that I could get help with my problem. After awhile of being in reassessment I got out and introduced to the family. I was scared at first. But after a while I opened up. I wanted and had come for help. They say that a closed mouth doesn’t get fed! I had opened mine wide. This program didn’t run on anything but suggestions. I wish that I knew that following these suggestions was going to prevent me from coming in and out of jail.

I didn’t know anything about a sponsor or having an all men’s meeting to go to. And, most of all stay away from drugs. This is why today I think that it’s important to have a young men’s group to come to. So that you have young men like myself in a room helping each other. So that they don’t have to come to the pen with a long time and never have a chance to see a stop sign again or their family. That’s why today it’s good not to make enemy because you never know when it will come back to change your whole life. It’s called karma.